why we love men

i was browsing through paulo coelho's blog when i came across on one of his articles "Why we love men", which was sent to him by one of his friends. as i scanned the artik, i can't help but agree to most of the items listed below.


'WHY WE LOVE MEN'

We love men because they can never fake orgasms, even if they wanted to.

Because they write poems, songs, and books in our honor.

Because they never understand us, but they never give up.

Because they can see beauty in women when women have long ceased to see any beauty in themselves.

Because they come from little boys.

Because they can churn out long, intricate, Machiavellian, or incredibly complex mathematics and physics equations, but they can be comparably clueless when it comes to women.

Because they are incredible lovers and never rest until we’re happy.

Because they elevate sports to religion.

Because they’re never afraid of the dark.

Because they don’t care how they look or if they age.

Because they persevere in making and repairing things beyond their abilities, with the naïve self-assurance of the teenage boy who knew everything.

Because they never wear or dream of wearing high heels.

Because they’re always ready for sex.

Because they’re like pomegranates: lots of inedible parts, but the juicy seeds are incredibly tasty and succulent and usually exceed your expectations.

Because they’re afraid to go bald.

Because you always know what they think and they always mean what they say.

Because their biggest fear is not being a man, and for this, they need to go away from time to time.

Because they love machines, tools, and implements with the same ferocity women love jewelry.

Because they go to great lengths to hide, unsuccessfully, that they are frail and human.

Because they either speak too much or not at all to that end.

Because they always finish the food on their plate.

Because they are brave in front of insects and mice.

Because a well-spoken four-year old girl can reduce them to silence, and a beautiful 25-year old can reduce them to slobbering idiots.

Because they want to be either omnivorous or ascetic, warriors or lovers, artists or generals, but nothing in-between.

Because for them there’s no such thing as too much adrenaline.

Because when all is said and done, they can’t live without us, no matter how hard they try.

Because they’re truly as simple as they claim to be.

Because they love extremes and when they go to extremes, we’re there to catch them.

Because they’ve got that comfortable place on their shoulder that’s perfect for snuggling into while we fall asleep.

Because they are tender when they cry, and how seldom they do it.

Because what they lack in talk, they tend to make up for in action.

Because they make excellent companions when driving through rough neighborhoods or walking past dark alleys.

Because they really love their moms, and they remind us of our dads.

Because they never care what their horoscope, their mother-in-law, nor the neighbors say.

Because they rarely lie about their age, their weight, or their clothing size.

Because they give great hugs, ( and always melt our hearts when a sweet “I love you” is added)

Because they have an uncanny ability to look deeply into our eyes and connect with our heart, even when we don’t want them to.

Because we love them, and only a man would think that requires an explanation.



...and even while there are plenty of reasons why we love men, there are also reasons why we can't help but HATE them.



'WHY WE HATE MEN'

We hate men because they can’t fake an orgasm, even if they wanted to…meanwhile faking one is the only way I’m gonna get one with him.

Because they will never understand us and they don’t even try.

Because no matter how beautiful we are, his eye is always roving for something more.

Because they think they know everything there is to know about politics and economics yet men are the ones who fucked that stuff up.

Because they are lovers who rest after they get their pleasure.

Because they manage to be obsessed with sports.

Because they never put the flashlight back where it’s supposed to be and then can never find it when it’s dark.

Because they never fix the things they promise too until nagged into doing so.

Because they wouldn’t know a pomegranate if it flew out of their ass.

Because they piss me and the neighbors off by not mowing the grass.

Because we always know what they are thinking, and when they open their mouth they tell that same story I’ve heard a million times.

Because he wants to wear my high heels while I torture him.

Because they love to explore our bodies and care not about the soul.

Because they come on to 14 years olds thinking they are 25.

Because they are always attracted to extremes…extremely skanky women, extremely fake boobs, etc.

Because they do absolutely everything possible to try to hide their weaknesses and won’t admit when they are wrong.

Because a man’s biggest fear is being attracted to another man.

Because they always eat everything on their plate and not gain weight while we have to starve.

Because they take great delight in regaling me with tales of completely uninteresting matters, such as what happened at work, or different makes of automobiles.

Because they sleep with little effort while we lie there awake all night and listen to their snoring.

Because they are at peace with their bodies, letting themselves grow bald and get fat while expecting us to maintain our looks.

Because hunting and killing defenseless deer and other animals makes them feel courageous.

Because they can’t remember our birthday, anniversary, etc but seem to remember football scores from games many years past.

Because they think that women need them more than we need us.

Because when we tell one of them “I love you”, they say “yeah” or “cool” …they don’t want to say the words.